J.B. Sommerset

"Moose in the yard" (c) 2025 J.B. Sommerset So, you're back. That means I am not just sitting here telling my story to myself- the reason so many people think I am crazy. To catch up, here's Part 11: Son of a bitch! Radiant floor heating and argon filled super windows..   To read from the start of all this, here's Part 1: "How I wound up on this mountain..."   Below is Part 12 , as promised, here is the technical stuff. So, we had a problem, we had already entered into a contract with the pole barn guy. We had signed to have him build a 40x60 structure on our build site, a contract which we tried to get out of when we found that they had changed the energy credits for the county we lived in. He would not let us out of it, we know this because he started carbon copy all he communications to a law firm. True, it was a law firm with a lot of polyester in it, but we didn't have the time, the money, or the resources to fight it.  Well crap, again. Let me ...

Lunar Eclipse (c) 2026 J.B. Sommerset   I see you've returned. That's good because there is so much more to tell, and we're about to get dirty, not that American-flag speedo guy wasn't. So, here is part 11 (below).  To catch up, here's Part 10: Angry declarations and plan changes.   If you are completely lost, here's Part 1: "How I wound up on this mountain..."   Below is Part 11 , moving forward, we are going to get technical, so damn technical. Where was I? Oh, yes, the building of the house, or at least the start of it. No matter what any one tells you, plan, plan, and then, plan some more. It's not going to cost what you think it will. It'll cost about 2.5 times more. Maybe, 3 times more.  We had the money for the build, at least we did when the VID 19 snotted all over the world's salad-bar and we all wound up with a bad case of financial depression.  As time went by, in that little rental with the 30 second showers, the sewage problem,...

"Winter of 25" (c) J.B. Sommerset 2025 Welcome back, and bring on the fall weather! There's a chill in the air today, and it feels great! Especially up here in the mountains where the air is a little cleaner. As promised, here is part 10.  To catch up, here's Part 9: The land lord pilgrimage, and 30 second showers.   And if you need more than that, here's the start of all this, Part 1: "How I wound up on this mountain..."   If you are current, below is Part 10 , the part where the advice starts dropping, good advice, on how to build in remote locations.  I'll be up front about the moral of this part of the story, it's a simple one, check the codes in your county before you sell your house to build. Especially what kinds of houses can be built, permitted, financed, and insured. Also, where they can be built and what kinds of zoning is required. This is the first step, be honest with yourself and answer the question: "What kind of house do I w...

"Fire Sun" (c) 2026, J.B. Sommerset Welcome back, and big sigh of relief, we made it through fire season! Well most of us did, a lot of people lost their homes this year, especially over there in Spokane. The worst part was that one of those fires was started by an arsonist. As promised, here it is more of my story.  To catch up, here's Part 8: To homeless or not to homeless...   And if you need more than that, here is the start of all this, Part 1: "How I wound up on this mountain..."   If you are current, below is Part 9 , it gets weirder, not as weird as "American flag Speedo man", but still pretty damn weird.  After the pilgrimage to Clarkston, and the handing over of $3500.00 to someone who had way more money than us, we were given the keys and the lease agreement, which was month to month (kind of unheard of, and very  nice in this day and age where subscriptions and fiscal chains are all we know), we were set to move in. We closed around 3 days ...

  "The Sunflower stow away" (c) 2026 J.B. Sommerset Welcome back again, it's been a minute. So, here it is more of the story about me and the mountain.  To catch up, here's part 7: " "The toilette paper-apocalypse and the lung-butter that comes with it." " And if you need more than that, here is the start of all this, Part 1: "How I wound up on this mountain..."   If you are current, below is Part 8  of this odyssey, my journey to get away from people because most of them suck. I mentioned in the last post that one of the things that helped us build up here in this remote location was that I landed a GIS job working on "cadastral mapping", now before you say "Jesus dude, hike you glasses up a little further you fucking nerd!", let me explain... Okay, never mind that's fair. Here's the TLDR on what that means.  Cadastral mapping is the detailed recording, defining, and mapping of property boundaries, land owners...

"The Road" (c) 2025 J.B. Sommerset  Welcome back ya'll. This is the story of how I came to be living up here in the woods on this mountain.  To catch up, here's part 6: " "The toilette paper-apocalypse and the lung-butter that comes with it." " And if you need more than that, here is the start of all this, Part 1: "How I wound up on this mountain..."   If you are current, below is Part 7 . I honestly have no idea how long this unrefined drivel will continue. The only way to find out is to continue. Here's where we're at, back in the day, which wasn't that long ago, but feels like it was. It may have been a Tuesday, these things often happen on Tuesdays. In "the day" houses used to be at the very least a little more affordable. You know, "I can afford it now that I'm 40 affordable".   The kind of affordable that you know in 30 years, if you are still alive, you'll have paid off. Just in time to retir...

  Garden Cat Spider (c) 2026 J.B. Sommerset Welcome back readers, to the story of how I came to be living up here in the woods on this mountain. To catch up, here is part 4: " How to get rid of Winnebago prostitutes and Tupperware meth. " And if you need more than that, here is the start of all this, Part 1: "How I wound up on this mountain..."  If you are current, below is Part 5 . After we got rid of "American flag Speedo guy" and his "Winnebago prostitutes", we started having more of those life changing conversations about what we really wanted and how to get there. They were the "long into the middle of the night conversations". We both knew we were no longer happy in our little corner house, and we were also not feeling safe.  Just after the lot was vacated, a drunk driver had been traveling east-bound and flipped his car into the neighbors house. They were okay, but the house had to be repaired leaving them with a boarded up hole ...

The Lonely Cougar (c) J.B. Sommerset 2026 Continued from PART 2: "Hey hon... some dude tried to stab me out in the yard, is our insurance up to date?" Over the next few weeks we talked a lot about that old dream. The one where we sell most of our things and move to the woods. A dream in which get away from it all and make a new life with the wild animals and the trees. We were still kind of joking about it, but also kind of not joking.  After the tattooed miscreant had tried to stab me, "the dream" became a standard conversation in our house. One that got more and more attention as the world became "enshittified" under the Tangerine Mussolini's first attempt at ruining the world. At the time, it wasn't going too good for his diapered ass. Congress and his own incompetence had stifled his forward momentum. But that didn't mean things were hunky-dory, all "gorsh and good times" and shit. No, they were far from that. Most people could fe...

  "Moose and calf" J.B. Sommerset (c) 2025 Continued from Part 1: "How I wound up on this mountain..." We used to live in the city, back so long ago on that proverbial Tuesday I previously referred to. This story actually starts then, in 2016. I and my wife had just sold our previous house. We got bored and decided to start over again in a smaller more manageable house with less electrical issues, newer plumbing and a bigger yard. But also, we wanted a nicer neighborhood. At first, that little place had everything we wanted.   We bought that small house on a busy street corner. When I think back to how much we paid for that house I get a little teary eyed. It was in the "before times". Our mortgage was $700.00 a month. This was pre-COVID, things were better back then. However, at the time, the mortgage on the new place was more than the place we left, mostly because it was a double lot with a detached shop in the back. For the most part we were doing alri...

"Bear in the way" (c) J.B. Sommerset 2026 This all starts with a gang member, an attempted stabbing, and the follow up fentanyl foil in our yard... Wait, wait, hold on...  What is this story about? Well, as it turns out, its about how I wound up on this mountain and why I chose to live here, in the middle of the woods, thirteen miles from town. I figure this one has several parts, so strap in and buckle up and stay locked in, there are going to be a number of these. This is going to be a longer story, so lets back up and start in the "way back then" so the context will be firm and in place before we arrive in the "here and now". Lets go back to the beginning of this and then I will walk you through the process that led us (me and the wife) to where we are.  Context is everything, so lets define that context, bare with me while I walk you from through a few years of my life. This part, or more specifically these parts, are my origin story. Everyone has that...